Home > Christian Living > Kid Inundated With Marriage Proposals After Whipping Guitar Out At Youth G...
Christian Living Church
Kid Inundated With Marriage Proposals After Whipping Guitar Out At Youth Group

GARY, IN—Local teenager Mark Carson was inundated with a flood of marriage proposals after he casually whipped out his guitar after youth group Sunday afternoon, sources at Cataclysm Youth Collective confirmed.

The boy pulled out his $99 Squier acoustic and played a few bars of "Reckless Love," causing no less than 17 girls to immediately stop what they were doing and make a lucrative marriage offer.

While the majority of the offers he received were simple proposals, several more motivated girls offered valuable dowries. Stacy Pendleton's father even reportedly put a sizable tract of land and several dozen livestock on the table.

"I'm going to work through the offers and see what I want to do," Carson told reporters. "I really want to guard my heart and make sure I don't give it away too soon. Linda's pretty cool. I heard she plays video games. So she's probably first in line. But I dunno. Jennifer is a real Proverbs 31 hottie."

The number of marriage offers that Carson received doubled after he played a shaky B minor chord, sources confirmed at publishing time.

Readers of the Bee,

If just a small fraction of our visitors became subscribers, we'd have enough funding to stop running ads and reduce our dependence on big tech companies like Facebook and Google. Will you partner with us to make this possible?

)