PETERSBURG, KY — According to sources, Ken Ham has been caught red-handed trying to sneak into a local library to relocate all the evolution books to the fiction section.
Ham, evangelist for Young Earth Creationism and founder of the Creation Museum, defended his actions stating that the world couldn't afford to tolerate this affront on truth and actual science any longer.
"We can't let our children be indoctrinated by fairy tales like 'Origin of the Species' masquerading as science," Ham declared in a statement. "If that means a little guerrilla library warfare, so be it."
Witnesses say Ham donned a pair of reading glasses and a fake mustache, attempting to blend in with the regular library-goers as he stealthily maneuvered through the aisles. Armed with a label maker, he allegedly relabeled entire sections, moving "Evolutionary Biology" to "Fantasy & Fiction."
"I couldn't believe my eyes. There he was, reorganizing the entire library to fit a biblical Christian worldview," whispered one startled library patron. "And when he got to the dinosaur books he ran every page that mentioned millions of years through the shredder."
At publishing time, Ken Ham was once again caught shaking up the shelves, only this time he was scribbling out Charles Darwin's name and replacing it with 'The Devil'.
There's lots to be thankful for, libs!