Celebs Worldviews Ken Ham
Ken Ham Arrested For Vandalizing Grand Canyon Signs To Read 'JUST 4400 YEARS OLD'

GRAND CANYON NATIONAL PARK, AZ—It looks like Answers in Genesis president Ken Ham may have gotten himself into some legal trouble, as he was arrested early Friday under suspicion of vandalizing signs throughout the park to reflect a young-earth creationist viewpoint, authorities confirmed.

Ham was reportedly caught red-handed after posting pictures of his handiwork to his social media accounts.

Dozens of informational signs throughout the park tell visitors that the Colorado River carved the canyon over the past six million years—but Ham allegedly painted over these signs and wrote “CANYON JUST 4400 YEARS OLD—WAKE UP!” national park rangers said at a press conference.

“We found Ham hiding behind a large rock formation with several cans of spray paint and a Sharpie after seeing his Facebook posts and pinging his phone to determine his exact location,” one ranger said. “All evidence points to this being a one-man operation. Pretty much all of our visitor signs were ‘corrected’ by Ham—even the big one at the main entrance.”

While authorities informed Ham he had the right to remain silent, he continued to lecture his captors on the obvious catastrophic formation of the Grand Canyon, citing the sudden transformation of the state of Washington by Mount St. Helens in 1980, the “imaginary” geologic column, and the existence of out-of-place fossils at various levels of the Canyon’s strata.

At publishing time, Ham had miraculously escaped captivity and was seen painting over signs at the Natural History Museum of Los Angeles.