MEMPHIS, TN — According to sources, local dad Trey Marson is historically known by his kids as the most hilarious, fun, smart dad on earth. Unfortunately, he recently announced his son's 14th birthday — marking his transition into a totally lame and boring moron.
"My son is going through puberty, and I am now officially the most 'cringe' person on the entire planet," said Marson. "What on earth happened? I was a superhero just a few days ago!" This statement prompted his son to roll his eyes and say "UGGGHHHH DAAAD seriously you're so lame, please stop!"
Sources confirmed that Mr. Marson's strange transition happened on the exact morning of his son's 14th birthday, although experts are unsure whether that's just a coincidence. "It's possible that Trey Marson has been lame this whole time and his son just now realized it," said one researcher. "More research has to be done — wait — is he mowing the lawn in cutoff jeans and Crocs?"
In a joint appearance with his son, the irredeemably uncool Dad tried to explain to reporters how cool he used to be, causing his son to throw a blanket over his head, jump out the window, and run away.
Can this liberal California couple handle their new life in Texas?