Here Are The Denominations Of Each Of The 7 Churches In Revelation
Sponsored · Jun 15, 2022 · BabylonBee.com

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While exiled on the island of Patmos, the apostle John experienced a grand vision that would not be fully understood until Left Behind: A Novel of the Earth's Last Days was published in 1995. But before John describes events that eventually took place in 2012 he relays a message to seven ancient churches that have been lost to history.

Ever wonder what denomination those churches were? Read on to find out!

1) Ephesus

Really good at discerning truth from error but no love - Your annoying Calvinist friends.

 

2) Smyrna

Rich in good works, enduring trials - Definitely not any church in America. Must be the underground Chinese church.

 

3) Pergamos

Tolerates sexual immorality and idols but is still technically Christian - Episcopalians

 

4) Thyatira

Tolerates Jezebel but has a few loyal Christ-followers remaining - Southern Baptists

 

5) Sardis

Technically alive but appear to be dead - Presbyterians

 

6) Philadelphia

Described as having "little strength" but has slow, patient endurance - Those skinny-armed Missouri Lutherans who really need to hit the gym

 

7) Laodicea

Lukewarm, poor, blind, and naked - We're tempted to say this is Joel Osteen's church but honestly, it's all of us. REPENT.


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The world is living in perilous times, and the subject of this documentary could not be more relevant for the church today. Watch now.


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