WASHINGTON, D.C. - After successfully plundering the dreams and futures of your great-grandchildren to pay off unions and poorly run blue states, the Democrat Party has announced they are moving on to plundering your great-great-grandchildren.
"We wanted to spend another $6 trillion, but we ran out of everyone's great-grandkids' money," said Senator Chuck Schumer, "but then we found all the great-great-grandkids' money! So much money! So we decided to spend it."
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi also backed the legislation, saying: "Your great-great-grandkids aren't around to stop us, which is good because spending all this money is a moral Christian imperative!"
Investigative reporters discovered, however, that Pelosi's great-great-grandkids are actually living, as well as her great-great-great-grandkids. Sources say they have all condemned the reckless spending bills.
Pelosi then denounced her great-great-grandkids and her great-great-great-grandkids as "heartless" and "shameful."
The House is suspected to vote on a bill next month to steal from your great-great-great-great-grandkids.