SACRAMENTO, CA—Gavin Newsom has announced a plan to go undercover as a turkey to catch families who are celebrating Thanksgiving this year.
Newsom will dress in a large turkey costume and infiltrate family gatherings, checking to make sure families aren't violating any of his orders.
The governor participated in a trial run of his plan, infiltrating a mock Thanksgiving dinner at the governor's sprawling mansion estate. "Gobble gobble," Newsom said as he casually slipped in through the door. "Gobble? Gobble!" He tried to blend in with the Thanksgiving decorations set throughout the room as he monitored guests to make sure they were social distancing, logging into the family's Thanksgiving dinner sign-in sheet, and not sharing any food.
Unfortunately, Newsom broke character when he saw someone double-dip a chip, screaming, "YOU'RE OFFENDING SCIENCE!!!" and the plot was foiled.