Christian Grabs Coffee, Logs In To The Daily Wire For Morning Devotions
Christian Living · Mar 12, 2020 · BabylonBee.com

FLINT, MI - Local Christian conservative warrior Travis Bronner woke up before sunrise this morning to center his mind before the rush of the day, according to sources. After brewing a cup of Black Rifle coffee, Travis sat down to meditate on the timeless words of Ben Shapiro, Steven Crowder, Dan Bongino, and Dennis Prager. 

"It's really important to fuel your rage by consuming troubling news as soon as you wake up," said Travis. "I find that when I hide the words of the Wire in my heart, or exegete the comedy of Crowder, I am better equipped to own and destroy every liberal I come in contact with." 

Travis memorizes one PragerU video and one Babylon Bee article every day. He's also a faithful reader of "Our Daily Wire," Jeremy Boreing's new devotional booklet for committed conservatives which is now available for platinum subscribers. Day #1 of the booklet begins with Shapiro's beautiful meditation: "Lo, if I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not own the libs and drink their tears, I am nothing." 

Travis also plans to read his Bible today, but it's gonna be tough since he's 3 podcasts behind on the Matt Walsh show. 


Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.