ISTANBUL — In a remarkable moment of Church history, leaders of the Catholic and Orthodox Churches have come together to officially denounce Wham's "Last Christmas".
Pope Leo and Ecumenical Patriarch Bartholomew came together in Istanbul to make the joint pronouncement condemning the ubiquitous holiday ditty.
"After centuries of schism, there is once again union between the Catholic and Orthodox Churches as we stand united in opposition to Wham," said Pope Leo. "Today, we set aside our disagreements over the filioque and work together with our Orthodox brothers for the common cause of defeating the scourge of 'Last Christmas'. May God give us strength in the face of this wicked curse that has afflicted so many."
Thousands of worshippers then participated in a joint liturgy, lifting up the intentions of the Holy Father and Patriarch that "Last Christmas" may be purged from the earth. "We cannot win this fight alone," said local man Yusuf Demir. "For decades, the plague of 'Last Christmas' has tormented millions as the Church stood fractured. Today marks a new beginning and a ray of hope against the powers of Wham."
At publishing time, the Catholic and Orthodox Churches had also issued a joint decree denouncing "Do They Know It's Christmas?"
Heartwarming!
