Politics
Biden: 'My Doc Says I Don't Have Alzheimer's, Dementia, Or Alzheimer's'

WILMINGTON, DE—In a recent live stream, Joe Biden proudly declared that his physician had cleared him of Alzheimer's, dementia, and Alzheimer's.

"My doc says I don't have Alzheimer's, dementia, or Alzheimer's," he said confidently. "Oh, and he also cleared me of Alzheimer's."

Aides could be heard scrambling around to try to cut the video feed.

"Yep -- completely clear of Alzheimer's, dementia, and Alzheimer's," he said. "Wait - who are you people? What are all these cameras doing here? Who am I? WHO AM I!?!?!"

At the end of the video, after aides finally calmed him down but before they were able to cut the feed, Biden added, "My doc says I don't have Alzheimer's, dementia, or Alzheimer's."

The Press quickly praised the speech as one of Biden's most coherent.

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