ROME - New Year's Eve the world witnessed a historical event when the Pope repeatedly slapped a woman's hand after she tugged on his arm in a forceful, Trump-like fashion. While the Pope went on to issue an apology for the incident, the woman, Susan Née, had the hand wrapped in cellophane and immediately removed. She then put the severed appendage on eBay where an intense bidding war hit an incredible price of $1.3 billion before closing. 

"This is a piece of history," said the buyer, a wealthy Swedish industrialist named Svenson Borga. "The Pope shakes a lot of hands, but he never slaps them. I predict this hand will only go up in value."

While Borga has immediate plans to put the hand in his private collection, he says he will consider allowing it to be housed at the Vatican Museum Of Papal Wonders from time to time.

Nee says she has no regrets and will use a large portion of her money to build the world's first real "go go Gadget arm," which she says would have come in very handy in the situation with the Pope (pun hers).