Worldviews
Woke Blind Woman Keeps Mistakenly Telling Minorities To Check Their Privilege

ATLANTA, GA—According to sources, local blind woman Eyeleen Kahntsee has been reprimanded by her employer for repeatedly approaching minorities she works with and telling them to "check their privilege."

"I am a very proud antiracist, but my physical blindness makes it really hard for me to see people's skin color so I can tell whether they're privileged or not," said Kahntsee. "Sometimes it gets me into trouble."

Her employer was first made aware after a formal complaint was submitted to HR by John Smith, a black man, and coworker of Kahntsee. Witnesses say that after John mentioned that another coworker was dropping the ball on a project, Kahntsee sternly told him to "check his privilege." 

"Well, that's easy for you to say as a white man!" she said angrily while wagging a finger in his general direction, but not precisely in his direction due to her being blind. "CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE, BIGOT!" 

When informed by John that he was actually a black man, Kahntsee replied, "Wow! You're so clean and articulate! I love black people!"

Kahntsee has remedied the situation by purchasing a seeing-eye dog that will bark once when they see a white person and bark twice when they see a black person so she'll always know what race everyone is so she can judge their privilege properly.

"I may be blind, but I refuse to be colorblind!" she said. 

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