LONDON — Citing new laws criminalizing offensive online behavior, British police have issued an arrest warrant for social media user "@Real_PopeFranci$" over repeated posts featuring gay slurs.
"Hate will not win. The British police will not abide the use of such derogatory term for homos," announced Officer Roy Blarthington. "We're coming for you, whoever you are, 'Real Pope Francis.' You can no longer hide your bigotry behind a screen."
According to sources, British police have been monitoring the account for several months, which has mixed posts on spiritual matters, climate change, and several gay slurs. "We can now confirm we have tracked the social media handle to somewhere inside Italy," announced Blarthington. "Trust me when I say we will hunt this monster down and he or she will face the full force of British law."
At publishing time, the account "@Real_PopeFranci$" had written a new post in response to the warrant reading, "Come and get me, you (gay slur redacted)."
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