Well, you'd better take some time to get right with the Lord. The pastor was preaching about sin this past Sunday, and he made an inordinate amount of eye contact with you the whole time.

"And so, some of us really need to repent," he said, his eyes scanning the crowd before falling directly on you and hovering there, his head shaking ever so slightly. "There are some of us in this congregation who really need to repent. Some of us who have things we need to bring to the Lord. Some of us who need to kill their sin so they can find their joy in God alone once again."

You gulped and felt a bead of sweat begin to form on your forehead.

He maintained eye contact, never even blinking.

"You know who you are." Finally, he looked away as he moved on to his eighteenth sermon point about love or something.

The pastor also does this when he's asking for volunteers for children's ministry, sources at your church confirmed at publishing time.