WASHINGTON, D.C. — After Iran once again fired on ships in the Strait of Hormuz despite an agreement not to, President Donald Trump began to think that perhaps the Iranian government might not be so trustworthy after all.
According to the White House, after Iran had broken promises about hanging dissidents, charging tolls for ship passage, arming terrorist proxies, attacking Gulf allies, enriching uranium, attempting to assassinate the U.S. president, and opening the Strait of Hormuz, Trump started to question whether they were really as honest as he previously hoped.
"You know, I'm starting to have doubts about these guys," Trump told Vice President JD Vance after hearing another ship had been bombed. "You ever get the feeling like they're maybe not telling the entire truth, JD? Like, maybe they aren't going to always do what they say? I don't want to rush to judgment, but it's starting to seem that way."
For its part, the Iranian delegation has stated that they are super-duper trustworthy and to pay no attention to the giant oil tanker engulfed in flames behind them. "We are absolutely abiding by all the terms of the agreement. In fact, we're the ones worried about how dependable you are," said negotiator Ahmad Kazir. "We are no longer hanging dissidents, at least as of five seconds ago, and the strait is completely open and toll-free. Don't let any explosions or people screaming 'Whoa, look out for the incoming Iranian done' lead you to believe otherwise."
At publishing time, Trump had also begun to think these Hezbollah fellows might not all be on the up-and-up either.
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