WASHINGTON, D.C. - According to sources at the White House, President Trump took a few minutes Friday morning to hang a portrait of North Korean leader Kim Jong Un up in the Oval Office, stating the painting inspires him to be a better, more totalitarian kind of ruler.

"Is this centered, or should I move a little more to the right? What? A lot more to the right?" he asked an aide, who was guiding him from a few feet back. "OK. I think this looks great. Tremendous. It fits right in here next to Jackson and Lincoln." Trump went on to regale his aide with stories about how many portraits and propaganda pieces the North Koreans have hanging all over their public buildings, street corners, and churches. "It's just a really great country over there. We could all learn a little from those guys."

At publishing time, Trump had purchased an official portrait of Vladimir Putin to hang next to the picture of the brutal North Korean dictator.