The Babylon Bee Fact-Checks 10 Controversial Statements From President Biden
Politics · May 4, 2021 ·

It's hard to know what's true these days. That's why our fact-checkers work around the clock to protect you from dangerous misinformation that could lead your feeble little mind astray.

How do Biden's most influential statements stand up to our rigorous fact-checking? Read and find out! You can trust us. We're fact-checkers.   

1. "So you go ahead and you stack spaghetti sauce at a store, and and and a supermarket, you control the guy or the woman who runs the brings out the carts on on on ah, on a forklift." 


After researching this claim from Biden, we found there are indeed people who stack spaghetti sauce at grocery stores. We could not confirm whether the spaghetti sauce stackers actually control the people who bring out the carts, or whether they use a forklift to do so. While some facts of the claim are unconfirmed, we're rating this true because Biden is a really good guy. 

2. "High-speed rail at 200 miles an hour from Charlotte, one, and another line going from, in Florida, down to Tampa. Another line, if we had moved Gov, we would have had that tunnel fixed in New York now. The money was there to get it done."


According to our research, there are some high-speed trains that can reach speeds of 200 miles per hour. Charlotte, Florida, Tampa, and New York are all real places. Money exists. It doesn't get more accurate than this. 

3. "Could.. take care if you were a quartermaster, you can sure in hell take care running a you know, a department store, thing, uh, you know, where the second floor of the ladies department or whatever."


While the specific meaning of this isolated Biden quote is unclear, it was spoken in the context of a larger discussion about Biden caring about poor people and doing good things for minorities. He's the best. 

4. "And the kids used to come up and reach in the pool and rub my leg down so it was straight and then watch the hair come back up again. So I learned about roaches, and about kids jumping on my lap. And I love kids jumping on my lap."


We'll get back to you on this. 

5. "Now we have over 120 million dead from COVID."


While the specific numbers of this claim aren't technically accurate, they speak to a deeper truth that COVID is really bad. Thanks for protecting us, Mr. President!

6. "I may be Irish but I'm not stupid."


Our researchers determined Biden has English, French, and Irish heritage, so the first part of his statement is true. He also has an IQ of 76, which technically means he doesn't fall under the definition of mentally handicapped. Another true statement! 

7. "I guess what I'm trying to say without boring you too long at breakfast - and you all look dull as hell, I might add. The dullest audience I have ever spoken to. Just sitting there, staring at me. Pretend you like me!"


The crowd was indeed very dull. We know because we were in it. And we are very dull. We appreciate Biden calling us out here and encouraging us to be better. 

8. "His mom lived in Long Island for ten years or so. God rest her soul. And- although, she's- wait- your mom's still- your mom's still alive. Your dad passed. God bless her soul."


Biden made this statement regarding Irish Prime Minister Brian Cowen's mother, who sources confirmed was indeed alive at the time. Biden also called Cowen's deceased father a "her." Since it is unclear what gender Cowen's father identified as at his death, we are giving Biden the benefit of a doubt and rating this "true." 

9. "Poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as white kids."


...we know what you meant Mr. President. It's ok! 

"You cannot go to a 7-11 or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent... I'm not joking."


Biden's statement was spoken during an exchange where he was praising the vibrant culture brought by Indian-Americans to the area of Delaware where he lives. It was actually the opposite of racist, and shame on you for thinking otherwise. 

10 out of 10 successful fact-checks for President Biden! 


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