WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a win for government efficiency, the Supreme Court has opted to move into the Oval Office with Biden so they can strike down all his unconstitutional mandates in real-time.
"Listen, our caseload is insane as it is," said an exhausted Chief Justice Roberts. "Biden is clogging up the system with all these ridiculous royal decrees of his, so we're just gonna stand here behind him and strike them down as he writes 'em, assembly-line style!"
Later that morning, Biden sat down to sign his daily batch of executive orders. He was getting ready to sign a new order requiring cat moms to be given 12 weeks of maternity leave every time they buy a cat when Clarence Thomas reached in and smacked the pen out of Biden's hand.
"NO! No Biden! BAD Biden!" said Justice Thomas sternly. "That's unconstitutional! Nice try!"
Biden began to sob as he wasn't sure why he was there or why the clean, articulate black man was yelling at him.
As the morning progressed, the Justices all took turns smacking the pen out of Biden's hand until all the executive orders were struck down and a confused Biden slunk out of the room crying.
After a hard morning's work, the Supreme Court decided to clock out early and reward themselves with a treat from one of the National Mall food trucks.