NEW YORK, NY — With the Writer's Guild still on strike, Saturday Night Live announced they will be back on air this weekend thanks to a popular new host who requires no writers since he can ad-lib for hours: Donald Trump.
"Yes, we know he's an evil orange fascist who will literally murder our democracy, but we have no other options here," said producer Lorne Michaels. "Trump is the only guy I know who can walk in without a script and still have everyone in stitches all night."
Sources confirmed this weekend's episode will feature Trump wildly monologuing for an hour about the fake news media, Stormy Daniels, and the "phony and disgraceful Russian collusion WITCH HUNT." Already, protestors have gathered outside Rockefeller Plaza to protest the decision.
"We refuse to laugh at Trump, no matter how hilarious he may be," said one protestor. "If NBC doesn't reverse this decision to platform a violent fascist, we will burn this building down."
At publishing time, Nielsen had published a report anticipating record ratings this weekend for the struggling comedy show.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
