Politics
Sidney Powell Promises To Very Soon Show Us A Real UFO

WASHINGTON D.C.—Attorney Sidney Powell has vowed to any day now “release the space Kraken” -- to make public an avalanche of evidence of a real UFO.

“What you will see will fundamentally change our understanding of the universe and ourselves,” Powell told reporters. “It is indisputable proof of a UFO wreck and that certain forces have been trying to keep aliens a secret for years.”

Powell claims that in addition to photos and pieces of the wreckage -- proven to be something from another world -- she even has documented evidence of an alien autopsy.

When asked to see some actual evidence of aliens, Powell seemed to never hear the question and continued saying that “very, very soon” she will prove to the court that -- not only did a spacecraft with intelligent life from another planet crash on Earth, but that a vast conspiracy tried to keep it from the public -- a conspiracy that consisted of “Nancy Pelosi, the Illuminati, the ghost of Adolf Hitler, and Paul Hollywood from The Great British Bake Off.”

Tucker Carlson then grabbed Powell and shook her, shouting, “Just show me some evidence now! Anything!” but Powell went into a trance-like state and became unresponsive.

The Trump administration has distanced itself from Powell, saying she just showed up one day with their legal group, and Jenna Ellis thought she was with Rudy Guiliani, and Guiliani thought she was with Ellis, and everyone was too embarrassed to ask where she came from. They added, though, that if Powell does have any “cool photos of dead aliens,” they would like to see them.

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