NASHVILLE, TN — Country singer Brad Hicks has sold millions of albums and won over twenty CMA Awards, mostly for his songs about driving down dirt roads in a large, lifted pickup truck.
But one celebrity gossip website claims Hicks may be living a double life, as he was spotted driving a sensible, fuel-efficient sedan down a 5-lane freeway.
"He didn't even have a cute country girl all up in it," a witness stated. "And at the very least, he could have had it lifted — it looked like a stock suspension system for cryin' out loud!"
Other sources claim Hicks' vehicle didn't have any kind of patriotic stickers or emblems, and also failed to include any kind of gun rack. Still others told local country music enforcement officials that Hicks didn't even have his windows down, and instead had his air conditioning set to a practical 72 degrees.
"If he'd been driving down back roads, highways, or heck, even byways, I'd have given him a pass," popular country singer Brian Kelley told reporters. "But taking a sensible path down the interstate? Come on, that's ridiculous."
At publishing time, the Country Music Association had stripped Hicks of his awards pending a full investigation.
Their culture is not your costume. DO NOT appropriate ghost, zombie, or vampire culture this Halloween.