LONDON — The memorial service for Queen Elizabeth will be preceded by a warning that the funeral will contain a massive spoiler for The Crown.
"For those just getting to know Queen Elizabeth through the popular TV series The Crown, we strongly recommend you turn off your television immediately," reads the stark warning. "What you are about to see will really, really ruin the series finale. Trust us."
The popular historical drama about the life of Queen Elizabeth II has reportedly come in handy as Charles assumed the throne. "His entire preparation for the coronation was simply binge-watching The Crown," said royal aide Hank Barton. "If we're being honest, the man just got his first job at age seventy-three. He has a lot of catching up to do."
Showrunners for The Crown requested the spoiler alert be aired after they had rushed to Queen Elizabeth's deathbed to film the finale. "We really had something better scripted for the big finish, but when life throws you sausage and potatoes, you make bangers and mash," said producer Art Rogers. "It's just a shame the Queen didn't live to see the finale."
At publishing time, men across the world ignored the spoiler alert, as none of them have any idea what this show The Crown is.
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