WASHINGTON, D.C.—The Republican National Committee has launched an ambitious fundraiser to help the Democrats televise a debate every weeknight.
The move is expected to drum up significant support for the Republicans, not on their own merit but on the wackiness of the Dems.
"Look, it's tough for us to raise money by just saying the same talking points we've been using for years," said RNC Chair Ronna McDaniel. "Frankly, a lot of our policy positions are kind weird and not all that conservative. But if we can just let the Democrats talk for hours every night, we're sure to win."
The RNC is looking to raise over $100 million for the campaign strategy.
Proposed debate topics include The Evils of Capitalism: A Town Hall, When Should You Force Your Toddler To Change Genders?, The Merits of Men Beating Women In MMA, and A Bidding War on Taxes: How High Can We Go?
At publishing time, Republicans had raised enough money in the first hour of the fundraising campaign.
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.