Pathetic Conservative Hasn't Even Been Banned From Twitter Yet
Politics · Nov 26, 2018 ·

MOBILE, AL - Pathetic, fake, wannabe conservative man Bill Shaw hasn't even been banned from Twitter yet, sources close to the right-leaning man confirmed Monday.

Fellow conservatives quickly called Shaw's loyalty to the cause into question after discovering he hasn't so much as received a warning from Twitter for his tweets so far.

"I just don't know what I'm doing wrong," he said, shaking his head. "I've tried misgendering people, deadnaming people, retweeting Ben Shapiro - but nothing is working." Shaw states he posts using a slew of conservative hashtags but so far has been unable to draw the ire of Twitter or any other social network.

"He's probably a closet liberal," said one of his conservative friends. "I myself was banned from Twitter a year ago, proving my conservatism is real, unlike Bill's."

In a last-ditch effort to be accepted among his peers, Shaw posted a picture of himself in a MAGA hat, but it went completely ignored by Twitter's censors, cementing his status as a sorry excuse for a conservative.

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