New Exercise Bike Forces You To Watch Christian Movies Until You Hit Your Calories Goal
Health · Feb 22, 2018 · BabylonBee.com

U.S. - An exciting new exercise bike, sold under the brand "Christ Fit," will force the rider to watch Christian movies until he or she hits a chosen fitness goal for a given exercise session, sources confirmed Thursday.

Once the user hits a pre-selected goal of riding minutes, distance traveled, or burned calories, the exercise bike will turn off the Christian film and allow the user to change the programming to a different movie or TV program.

"We were looking for something to really motivate people to get moving," a Christ Fit representative said. "We tried playing Newsboys songs, gospel quartet sing-a-longs, and even some Rob Bell sermons. But nothing seemed to motivate those working out like forcing them to watch a corny Christian film made on a shoestring budget until they'd biked their hearts out."

Early tests indicated that unmotivated exercisers would pedal three to four times harder when subjected to a film like FireproofSaving Christmas, or God's Not Dead, with the promise of sweet release from the movie's death-grip motivating an unprecedented level of exertion.


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