Christian Living
Man's Street Cred Skyrockets After Ability To Rap Along With Every Early DC Talk Song Discovered

COMPTON, CA—Local man Wendell Martin was granted a "nearly unlimited supply" of street cred after his ability to rap along with every early DC Talk song was discovered by his friends Wednesday morning.

Martin was seen driving along the street in his Ford Focus with the windows rolled down, rapping along to the breakdown on "Jesus Is Just Alright," when several gang members flagged him down and told him he was "tight, yo."

When Martin was able to sing along to every word of "I Luv Rap Music," he was immediately granted membership in both the Bloods and the Crips.

"We've never seen a guy who can spit decent Christian talk like our boy Big W here," said his friend MC Gouda. "This guy is legit—he could be the next Ice Cube, back in the NWA days and not those weird family films he did in the early 2000s."

The man is taking his newfound underground fame in stride.

"I'm not anyone special—I just sorta talk lyrics to rhythm and rhyme, and then deliver in various ways," he said.

"You know, some sorta preach and some sorta play," he added.

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