LOS ANGELES, CA—Upon receiving the necessary forms from his employer and beginning to file to pay his federal taxes, local man Kyle Jacobs scrawled an imprecatory psalm across the Internal Revenue Service’s form 1040, sources close to the man confirmed Tuesday.
As he saw how much of his money was forcibly taken from him and redistributed to whatever causes the state saw fit, Jacobs was moved to the point of anguish and called upon the Lord to smite his oppressors, according to those close to the situation. Recalling the words of one of the Psalmist’s imprecatory psalms, Jacobs began to scrawl a curse of judgment on the form, calling for God to send the IRS down to the very pit of Sheol.
“When I filed to hand over a large percentage of my income to the government, I suddenly realized how David felt while writing Psalm 55,” Jacobs said. “He was betrayed, stabbed in the back by a close friend, and I was forced to give the first three months of my labor to the state under threat of imprisonment or death.”
“It’s practically the same thing,” he added.
At publishing time, Jacobs had filed for his California state income taxes as well, and began to rend his garments and repent in dust and ashes upon seeing the damages.