Local Family Commutes 700 Miles To Attend Church That Meets Their Exact Specifications
Christian Living · Oct 9, 2017 · BabylonBee.com

LAS CRUCES, NM - The Everly family is now commuting 700 miles to church each Sunday in order to attend a congregation that meets their incredibly specific requirements, sources close to the family of four confirmed Monday.

The New Mexico residents pile in their minivan at around 9:00 on Saturday night in order to make the trek into a Los Angeles suburb, where the only church within a thousand-mile radius that meets all their stringent criteria is nestled in a gorgeous location by a foothill.

"We kicked the tires on a nice big church in Phoenix, which is only about 400 miles away, but their racquetball program turned out to be subpar," father Brett Everly said in an interview Monday. "How can I in good conscience lead my family to worship in a church that fails to meet all of our felt needs week in and week out?"

"I wouldn't be leading my family well if I took them to a place that's anything less than perfect," he added, further stating the family has been shopping for a church for the past five years before finally settling on the megachurch in the greater Los Angeles area.

The family's church shopping checklist reportedly included items like a service time that works for them, a whole host of ministries only tangentially related to the Great Commission, and plenty of fun events to take the family to throughout each week.

"There were a lot of churches that were really close to what we were looking for, but they'd inevitably mess something up," mother Grace Everly said. "Like the Bible says, if you stumble in one point, you're tough out of luck."


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