LOS ANGELES, CA — Following last week's primary elections, L.A. residents now face a difficult choice in the general election between an avowed communist and an avowed communist.
Incumbent communist Karen Bass will face off against committed communist Nithya Raman in November as voters select who to tun the communist regime for the city.
"It's a tough choice," L.A. voter Karla Martinez admitted. "On the one hand, you have a woman who fought with communists in Cuba. On the other hand, you have a woman who wants to seize all the means of production and centralize power. It's a toss-up, really."
The candidates, whose views range from Marxists to very Marxist, will have five months to make their case for who will be a better commie. "It's not a question of if the city will take away private property, the question is who will take away private property," explained local Spencer Marcus. "Which Bolshevik do you want eliminating all personal rights and ownership? These are the hard choices Los Angelenos will have to make."
At publishing time, early polls had revealed a statistical tie as to which woman would continue the city's descent into a communist hellscape.
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