Kamala Harris Instructed To Stop Answering All Her Phone Calls With 'Did He Die?'
Politics

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Vice President Kamala Harris has developed a bad habit, which White House staffers are trying to train her to not do. Any time the phone rings in her office in the West Wing, Harris immediately scrambles for it and answers it with an expectant, “Did he die?!”

“That’s just not a professional way to answer the phone,” Ronald Klain, President Joe Biden’s Chief of Staff, told her.

“Well, what am I supposed to say?” Harris asked.

“Try, ‘Hello.’”

The phone rang again. Harris immediately grabbed it and said, “Hello, did he die?”

Klain told her that still wasn’t appropriate.

“I just care a lot about Joe and his health,” Harris explained. “And he’s seemed particularly old lately. So—”

There was a knock at the door. Harris ran for the door and opened it, yelling, “Did he die, and you’ve come to tell me in person?!” But it was just an Amazon delivery. “Rats!”

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