WASHINGTON, DC — Vice President Kamala Harris stood strong under extraordinary pressure from the mainstream media in a recent press conference where she was peppered with hard-hitting questions such as "Ms. Harris, where did you get that adorable blouse?"
Sources say that Harris displayed incredible resilience in the face of overwhelmingly hostile questioning from press members who grilled her on where she had possibly managed to find that fabulous pantsuit.
"Ms. Harris," one reporter growled, an interrogatory gleam in his eyes. "The fact is, you have not yet been forthcoming on a few key issues. The American people deserve to know…how do you keep your skin looking so incredibly smooth? And where on earth did you get that GORGEOUS blouse?"
Harris blushed coyly, took a deep breath, and summoned her courage. "Well, blouses are like dress shirts for women," Harris answered demurely. "This is my blouse, because I'm wearing it. Blouse begins with B. B is the second letter of the alphabet. HAHAHAHAHA!!!"
Harris continued to hold up admirably under intense scrutiny throughout the rest of the half-hour conference as reporters asked her mean-spirited questions like "What is your hair care regimen?"
At publishing time, Kamala Harris had been spotted drowning a bunch of puppies, forcing the press to ask, "Why is Trump so racist and evil?"
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
