WASHINGTON, D.C. — The January 6th Committee is urging Americans to stay tuned until the very end of the hearings, as there will be another very special bonus hearing after the credits roll.
"Trust me, you won't want to miss this," said Congressman Adam Schiff. "We're going to be teasing a brand-new original storyline and some exciting new characters for the next hearing — which will definitely nail Donald Trump for good. This is the beginning of the end for Trump."
The committee urged patience, insisting that the January 6th hearings may have had a slow start but will be getting really good any day now. "When the January 6th hearings end in two or three months, be sure to watch through the 45-minute credit sequence for an exclusive look at our upcoming sequel!" said Schiff flatly.
Unfortunately, experts predict the post-credits hearing will never be seen as viewership is already down to just 23 people in the hearing room and Brian Stelter.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
