The Babylon Bee
**'How To Be A Perfect Christian' Releases On TUESDAY And You Should Preorder It Right Now**

Our new book hits the shelves on TUESDAY. For the love of modern worship ballads and megachurch cafés, you need to preorder this thing right now.

How to Be a Perfect Christian: Your Comprehensive Guide to Flawless Spiritual Living is 200 pages of brand-new material which spells out exactly how YOU can go from the terrible excuse for a believer that you are right now to a Perfect Christian through rigid, unquestioning obedience to every little quirk of modern Christian culture.

By the time you finish the book, you will be talking the Christian talk, which is even better than walking the Christian walk.

You can read the first chapter for free right here.

It’s available for preorder right now:

Barnes & Noble
Books A Million

As always, we are here for you. May God bless you as you read our book and journey toward Christian perfection*.

*Perfection NOT attainable without reading our book.

Breaking: PayPal Now Available

Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.

You must become a premium subscriber or login to view or post comments on this article.