Hip Worship Band Switches To Sea Shanties
Church · Jan 21, 2021 · BabylonBee.com

GREENVILLE, SC - In an effort to stay relevant in an ever-changing musical landscape, Elevate Spiritsong Worship Team of Spiritsong Church is introducing an all sea-shanty musical lineup for church this Sunday. 

"Listen, man, this is what the kids on TikTok are listening to," said worship pastor Chad Simmerman. "The gospel is relevant no matter what tribe or tongue sings it! People these days want to sing like scurvy sea dogs on a 19th-century whaling ship, so that's what we have to deliver!"

Elevate Spiritsong Worship will immerse churchgoers in the experience with state-of-the-art water cannons that shoot briny seawater in people's faces and will crank the fog machine up to its highest setting to give people the feeling of being whalers on a misty morning in the North Atlantic. 

"We can't wait to teach our congregation some of our newly adapted sea shanties like 'Reckless Wellerman,' 'I Will Rise (From Davy Jones's Locker)' and 'Oceans,'" said Simmerman. "Our only hang-up is we're trying to teach our bass player how to play the tin whistle and it's not going very well."

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