Here's Our Guide To Being Prepared For Rioting

BE SAFE. Here’s our guide on being prepared for safe and profitable rioting. PLEASE READ  

1. LOOK OUT FOR SWEET LOOT. We got purses, we got cell phones, we got cheesecake, shoes, Legos...

2. FOLLOW OTHER RIOTERS INTO STORES. If you just run into a store by yourself you might get shot.

3. HAVE A BUDDY. Those new 4K TVs are freaking heavy man.

4. STAY SAFE -- But also throw bricks at police. 

A Babylon Bee subscriber contributed to this report. If you want to get involved with the staff writers at The Babylon Bee, check out our membership options here!
There are 37 comments on this article.

You must become a premium subscriber or login to view or post comments on this article.

Get the Bee delivered straight to your inbox: