NEW YORK, NY — Mere days after CBS announced that it would be discontinuing The Late Show, a disheveled Stephen Colbert was seen on a Manhattan street corner holding up a cardboard sign that read "Will yell about Trump for cash."
Witnesses reported seeing the soon-to-be-former late-night talk show host sporting a rumpled suit and unkempt hair as he waved his makeshift placard at anyone who passed by and shouted at them that he would be more than happy to go on angry tirades about the president in return for money or food.
"I can rant about Trump as much as you want for a few bucks," Colbert was heard telling one woman as she walked by. "Come on, I'm so good at it. You'll really love it. It will be so arrogant and smarmy. Just pass me a few dollars, and I'll knock your socks off. Dozens of viewers used to listen to my tirades. Dozens!!"
Passersby admitted to being at least somewhat unsettled by Colbert's presence. "I get that he's down on his luck right now, but he seems pretty unhinged," one witness said. "At one point, he volunteered to promote experimental injections with a song and dance number. The man needs help."
At publishing time, a police patrolman had informed Colbert that his sidewalk Trump-berating show had also been canceled.
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