David Crowder Consumed By Own Beard During Quarantine
Celebs · May 15, 2020 · BabylonBee.com

ATLANTA, GA - Friends and family members were forced to call in a rescue crew to save musician David Crowder after he was trapped within his own beard after just a few weeks on lockdown. 

Crowder had been trying to perform a live-streamed show from his living room when he realized his beard had gotten too long for comfort. Crowder's family heard a muffled cry for help and looked in the corner to see a giant pile of hair with just his eyes poking out.

"Guys? Guys!" he called out from behind the curtain of beard. "A little help here?"

A rescue team arrived. "Come as you are," Crowder told them, motioning with his giant mess of hair to come free him.

Using an electric hedge trimmer, the emergency responders were eventually able to free Crowder from his hairy prison.

"I was in this dark web of hair, but I peered through the mess of knots and tangles and saw the light," he said after he had been rescued. "This isn't my victory -- it's the rescue team's."

Sadly, the next morning, it had grown right back.


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