BATON ROUGE, LA—In a heartfelt act of kindness and generosity, members at Riverfaith Community Church confirmed Friday that they are going to allow Pastor Mick Harrison to do all the work necessary to help the church thrive so that he'll get all the treasure in heaven.
From running Bible studies and visiting the sick to evangelizing and cleaning toilets, church members are lovingly allowing the pastor to do absolutely everything so that he'll get 100% of the associated rewards in the next life.
"It's just our little love gift to Pastor Mick," said one longtime church member. "If we were to lift a finger every once in a while, we'd be muzzling the ox by taking away all the rewards he'll get in heaven one day for carrying the whole church on his back."
Other church members echoed this sentiment, stating that they won't be volunteering for children's ministry, serving on the greeting team, or even bringing refreshments every once in a while.
"He'll thank us later," said Beth Freda, 67. "Though he may get really stressed out, anxious, and depressed having to do all the work while hundreds of us just show up demanding to be entertained week in and week out, one day he'll see we did this all for him."
At publishing time, the church had confirmed they would be reducing Harrison's salary "to further increase his heavenly haul."