NEW YORK, NY - The entire cast of The View has threatened to go on strike and resign in protest should Joe Rogan not be removed from Spotify. The bold gesture came as more and more high-profile musicians and celebrities piled on Neil Young's move to remove his music from the service due to medical misinformation, though this is a significant development as it's the first time someone under the age of 75 has made the move.
"It's either Rogan or us," said Whoopi Goldberg. "You decide. If you want our incredibly well-informed opinions, intelligent banter, and not-at-all grating commentary on the news and current events each and every morning, then you've got to dump Rogan."
The hosts say this move is designed to push people away from Rogan and show them celebrities are serious about not listening to podcasts that promote dangerous free speech and the exchange of uncensored ideas.
"What do people like more than discussing ideas? Celebrities' opinions, that's what," said Joy Behar. "If you listen to Rogan, you ain't gettin' none of these ladies' thoughts every morning. That's for darn sure!" She then snapped her fingers in a "z" formation.
Millions immediately responded to the threat by downloading Rogan's podcast, getting radicalized, and reading all of Jordan Peterson's books, all thanks to The View.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
