WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a moment of confusion at the White House this morning, President Joe Biden told one of his aides that he had a strange dream where he was talking and people were standing and clapping.

The bewildered president awoke today with distinct images in his mind of standing in a large room and giving some type of speech in front of a big crowd of people, half of whom seemed to be angry with him while the other half kept interrupting him with applause.

"It felt so real," Biden told his aides as they changed him out of his footie pajamas. "I was in that place. That building… the big one… with the round dome. And people kept wanting to shake my hand. I have no idea what I was saying, but I was pretty angry. There was a blonde woman in the crowd who kept shouting at me, but it wasn't Jill like it usually is. I kept trying to go back to sleep, but people wouldn't stop clapping all the time. Weird."

The president's staff assured him not to worry, despite his complaints that he felt like he had been drugged. "You're doing great, Mr. President," said one aide. "You had a great night last night. The restlessness you experienced during the night is perfectly normal and not in any way the result of being pumped full of an exotic cocktail of various medications. Now, do you want Lucky Charms or Cookie Crisp for breakfast, sir?"

At publishing time, Biden was overheard telling White House staff that everyone in his dream kept demanding he say college football coach Lincoln Riley's name.

World, meet Travis. Travis, meet the world. In this first episode of our new show Travis Interviews the World, we interview some guy named Jordan Peterson.