Ariana Grande Asks Producers If 'Wicked' Has Made Enough Money For Her To Get A Hot Meal
Entertainment · Nov 26, 2024 · BabylonBee.com
Tinseltown/Shutterstock

UNIVERSAL CITY, CA — After hearing that her new movie had a successful opening weekend, star Ariana Grande asked the film's producers if Wicked had made enough money for her to finally have a hot meal.

The seemingly emaciated actress reportedly made frantic phone calls to producers this week to find out if the substantial box office returns for the film would give her the opportunity to enjoy eating food.

"Can I eat now? Please?" Grande was overheard pleading over the phone. "I know you said things were looking good on Friday, and I heard people saying that the movie made a ton of money over the weekend. Does that mean I can have a hot meal? It's been so long."

Studio sources said Grande had been forced to go without eating during the film's production and media junket while waiting to find out if enough tickets were sold during its opening week for her to afford sustenance. "She was starting to look pretty desperate," one insider said. "I mean, if you've seen the movie, you know that it was basically her skeleton giving a performance. Thankfully, the film opened well, and we're expecting another big week for the Thanksgiving holiday, so we're all fairly hopeful that Ariana will get to eat sometime soon."

Producers were said to have been confident that Grande would be able to remain conscious and lucid enough to complete her media obligations before taking a break to eat.

At publishing time, witnesses claimed to have seen Grande at a local In-N-Out location ordering 12 double-doubles.


Watch as Democrats try to figure out what went wrong this election.

What will they do differently?

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now