There you are, sitting across from an elderly, demented man drooling on his oatmeal, when suddenly you begin to wonder: Am I in a nursing home, or in the chambers of the United States Senate?? To help you solve the mystery, look for these nine helpful differences:
1.
Nursing Home: Residents call out "Bingo!" to win money
Senate: Residents call out "Aye!" to spend your money
2.
Nursing Home: Costs $10,000 per resident per month
Senate: Costs $10 billion per resident per second
3.
Nursing Home: Residents alert a nurse when they've soiled themselves
Senate: Residents wave to camera as if nothing happened when they've soiled themselves
4.
Nursing Home: Surprisingly, plagued by STDs
Senate: Not surprisingly, plagued by STDs
5.
Nursing Home: Aides tell residents which domino to play
Senate: Aides tell residents which country to invade
6.
Nursing Home: Pudding and smoothies in the cafeteria at 4
Senate: Pudding, adrenochrome, and roasted flies in the cafeteria at 4
7.
Nursing Home: Smells of death and fecal matter
Senate: Same, if the President stops by
8.
Nursing Home: A bunch of old, angry people yelling about missing Matlock
Senate: A bunch of old, angry people yelling about missing Matlock
9.
Nursing Home: Residents all still alive
Senate: Residents were all, at some point, alive
It takes a keen eye to spot the differences - let us know any that we missed!
Senator Mitch McConnell isn't doing too many interviews these days, but The Babylon Bee's Travis got the opportunity to sit down with the man, the myth, and the legend himself.
