Apparently, the U.S. economy is in a recession right now, but who knows? We're told by experts that recessions are bad, so it's important to know whether you're in one. Fortunately, our experts put together this handy flowchart to help you figure it out!

Looks like we're safe, folks! You can rest easy.

Here is a comprehensive list of the only instances it is acceptable for men to shed a tear.