ISRAEL — Tourists have flocked to the Holy Land to behold the newly-unearthed projector Paul used to play Braveheart clips during sermons.
"It is so inspiring to see the actual projector used by the church fathers to watch Mel Gibson's masterpiece," said visitor Rowan Moody. "Two-thousand years later, here we are still explaining sermon points with Braveheart. It really connects you to the early church."
Archaeologists outside Jerusalem discovered the projector, along with the original Braveheart DVD used by Apostle Paul at the first-ever church men's conference. "No wonder Paul's preaching was so effective," said seminary professor Leon Melton. "When it comes to communicating the wages of sinful treason, and the turning of repentance - you simply can't beat clips of Robert the Bruce. It hits so deep."
Scholars have long suspected that Paul drove home the message of Christ with scenes from Braveheart, but thought the projector to be long lost. "Paul lugged that thing thousands of miles and saved it from a shipwreck, all to clearly communicate the Gospel," said Dr. Melton. "We too often take for granted having such easy access to watching Braveheart. How much sacrifice are we really willing to make to see it? Gazing upon the projector of Paul - it really makes you think."
At publishing time, the dig team announced they had also discovered Peter's copy of The Patriot.
In this instructional video, Chinese soldiers are trained how to shout the wrong pronouns at American forces: