After Asking Nation How It's Doing, Elmo Announces Next Sesame Street Episode Will Be Sponsored By Letter 'X' For Xanax
Entertainment · Jan 31, 2024 · BabylonBee.com

SESAME STREET — Following the overwhelming response to an innocuous social media post in which he asked the nation how it's doing, Elmo later announced that the next Sesame Street episode will be sponsored by the letter ‘X' for Xanax.

The seemingly harmless post, which quickly went viral and prompted thousands of replies from beleaguered Americans pouring out their hearts and venting to Elmo about their problems, left the beloved Muppet in a depressed state as he pondered the future of the country.

"Elmo had no idea people's lives were in such bad shape," Elmo said as he sat on the front steps of the iconic apartment building at 123 Sesame Street. "Elmo has PTSD now. Elmo may never get over this feeling. Where is Elmo's vitamin X?"

Following the response from so many stressed followers, Elmo's friends reported that he was no longer his usual cheerful, optimistic self. "Yeah, it's a shame to see the kid in this state of mind," said Oscar the Grouch. "Me? I'm used to seeing the world the way it really is, but Elmo's always been so innocent and childlike. Once you catch a glimpse of the dark, seedy underbelly of real life, it changes you. Permanently. Here's hoping he pulls out of it before too long."

At publishing time, Elmo announced that the next episode of the classic children's public television program would be sponsored by the letter "B," which insiders confirmed stands for "Benzodiazepine".


Check out Hasbro's latest update to the classic board game "Guess Who?" - now with more genders, inclusion, and fun!* *Fun not guaranteed

Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more tactical instruction

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.