9/11 Mastermind Given Plea Deal After FBI Confirms He Was Not Present At Capitol January 6th
U.S. · Aug 1, 2024 · BabylonBee.com

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a notable development in a case that has spanned over two decades, the mastermind behind the 9/11 terrorist attacks was given a plea deal after the FBI confirmed that he was not present at the U.S. Capitol on January 6.

Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, held in U.S. custody since 2003, agreed to a deal that will allow him to avoid the death penalty after investigators were able to rule out his involvement in the far more terrible and tragic events at the Capitol on January 6, 2021.

"He did some things to some people, but he wasn't part of the darkest day in American history," said FBI Director Christopher Wray. "We conducted a thorough investigation into any potential connection he may have had to the attempted insurrection on January 6, 2021, but were only able to find evidence that he planned the 9/11 terrorist attacks that killed over 3,000 Americans, which isn't nearly as serious."

Though family members of those who lost their lives in the attacks on September 11, 2001 questioned the Biden administration for making the deal, insiders reiterated Khalid Sheikh Mohammed's lack of involvement in the Jan 6 Capitol riots. "It's important to keep things in perspective," one source said. "While there are people who have grown up never knowing their fathers or mothers because they were killed on 9/11, that pales in comparison to that horrible day when some people calmly walked through the halls of the U.S. Capitol."

At publishing time, the Justice Department was also reportedly preparing to posthumously pardon Osama bin Laden after finding out he was not a supporter of Donald Trump.


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