Toxic masculinity has been under fire since third-wave feminism in the ‘90s, and for good reason – men have brought nothing but wickedness and dirty laundry into the world from the beginning. Want examples? Here are 9 horrible things brought to you by toxic masculinity:

• The wheel: It was just an excuse to frame women for running over curbs!
• Running water: Seems like a technological advance, but it's just another male ploy to keep women in the kitchen where they belong. Disgusting!
• Sports: NASCAR, WWE, MMA – the oppression runs so deep that even most women's sports are run by men.
• Law and order: The actual institution, and probably the show too.
• Open jars: This may sound positive, but men erase all the goodwill from their service by always eating the last peach.
• "Eh, the spoon's probably clean enough": Men tout this as an "advancement for efficiency." Disgusting again!
• Most science: Science? Who needs it? We have Dr. Fauci!
• People: Men are involved in the procreation of humans. Humans are the worst. Thanks a lot, men.
• Feminism: If only loving, servant-hearted leadership were more common, this blight on our society may not exist.

Now go and boycott anything invented or maintained by men – smash the patriarchy!

World, meet Travis. Travis, meet the world. In this first episode of our new show Travis Interviews the World, we interview some guy named Jordan Peterson.