The Babylon Bee
Life
· Oct 8, 2026
· 49
Irony: Man Finally Finds Perfectly Ripe Avocado At The Grocery Store But Is Killed In A Car Crash On The Way Home
SCRANTON, PA - After years of failed attempts, local man Paul Foster finally found a perfectly ripe avocado at the grocery store, only to be tragicall...
U.S.
· Oct 8, 2026
· 37
Experts Fear Terrorist Activity In Minneapolis Could Spread To America Next
U.S. - After a terrorist attack on the Mall of America was narrowly thwarted yesterday, experts warned that terrorist activity could spread beyond Min...
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Buzzing
World
· Oct 6, 2026
· 118
Palestinians Finally Granted Own Country
PARIS - At long last, the Palestinian people finally have a land to truly call their own.
Politics
· Oct 7, 2026
· 50
Mamdani's October 7th Address Derailed As Wife's Party Balloons Keep Floating Across Screen
NEW YORK, NY - Mayor Zohran Mamdani attempted to deliver a solemn address to mark the anniversary of October 7th, but was derailed as his wife's party...
U.S.
· Oct 5, 2026
· 157
Top 10 Reasons To Move To Indiana
Looking to move to a new state? Look no further than Indiana! There are plenty of reasons to move there. Seriously.
Worldviews
· Oct 7, 2026
· 43
Liberals Prepare For Anniversary Of October 8, The Day Israel Attacked Gaza For No Reason
NEW YORK, NY - Liberals around the country prepared to commemorate the anniversary of October eighth, the day Israel attacked Gaza completely unprovok...
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Crime
· Oct 6, 2026
· 57
9 Crimes Pete Hegseth Just Declared Worthy Of Death Penalty
The Pentagon officially approved execution by firing squad for the Fort Hood shooter, but that's not the only crime the military is seeking the death ...
Crime
· Oct 7, 2026
· 49
Experts Theorize Possible Connection Between TikTokers Celebrating Women Killing Their Children And More Women Killing Their Children
U.S. - Could there be a connection between TikTokers celebrating women killing their children and more women killing their children? Experts at the Am...
Life
· Oct 7, 2026
· 48
God Excitedly Waiting To Press 'Destruct' On Man's 40-Year-Old Body
SANDWICH, IL - A new chapter of life was set to begin for one local father, as sources in Heaven confirmed that God was excitedly waiting to press the...
Celebs
· Oct 6, 2026
· 91
Ariana Grande Lands Seasonal Gig As Halloween Lawn Skeleton
LOS ANGELES, CA - Singer-actress Ariana Grande was excited to make some extra money this fall as she landed the role of a lifetime as a Halloween lawn...
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Premium
· Oct 8, 2026
· 45
Dad Commits Harakiri In Shame After Not Mowing Lawn Lines Perfectly Straight
This bonus article is for you, our valued subscribers. Enjoy!
Premium
· Oct 6, 2026
· 145
Will Your Favorite Animal Go To Heaven Or Hell? A Handy Guide
Here is a bonus article for all you Babylon Bee subscribers.
Premium
· Oct 5, 2026
· 67
How Was Church? Ladder Edition
It's Monday, and you know what that means! The almost obligatory "How Was Church?" post. How was your Lord's Day service? Did your pastor use any ladd...
Premium
· Oct 2, 2026
· 45
The Babylon Bee Weekly Roundup | Friday, October 2, 2026
It's Friday and that means it is time for The Babylon Bee's Weekly Roundup! We're here to catch you up on the biggest stories of the past week as repo...
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