U.S.
· Jul 16, 2026
· 26
‪Hegseth Orders Any Military Personnel With Low Testosterone Be Transferred To The Navy‬
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Secretary of War Pete Hegseth issued a new order that any military member who is discovered to have low testosterone be immediately...
Media
· Jul 16, 2026
· 39
Cockroach Maintains Composure Despite Making Contact With Journalist
SHERMAN OAKS, CA - A local cockroach somehow maintained his composure on camera despite unexpectedly making contact with a journalist.
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Politics
· Jul 15, 2026
· 160
10 Rejected Titles For Biden’s New Memoir
At long last, the wait is over - President Joe Biden has written a memoir about his time in the White House. The book, titled Promise Me, America, wil...
Health
· Jul 15, 2026
· 60
Explosive Diarrhea Epidemic Traced To Gain-Of-Function Lab At Taco Bell Institute
IRVINE, CA - Though initial reports indicated that the recent cyclosporiasis outbreak had happened naturally through people consuming produce contamin...
Sponsored
· Jul 14, 2026
· 60
8 Ways Christopher Nolan’s ‘The Odyssey’ Diverges From Its Source Material
Christopher Nolan's The Odyssey hits theaters on July 17, but it's bringing a few changes with it. Here are just a few ways the new film deviates from...
World
· Jul 15, 2026
· 87
Trump To Secure Strait Of Hormuz By Posting Old Man Who Asks You 3 Questions Before You May Pass
DOHA - With the U.S. blockade of the important waterway back on amid renewed hostilities in Iran, President Donald Trump announced that he would secur...
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Politics
· Jul 13, 2026
· 107
7 Clear Signs Mitch McConnell's Hospital Photo Is Fake
Is Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell really still alive? A new photo of him in a hospital bed with his wife by his side appears to confirm it... or doe...
U.S.
· Jul 15, 2026
· 58
Study Shows Mysterious Link Between Trying To Run Over ICE Agent And Bullets Striking Windshield
U.S. - Following yet another controversial incident in recent days involving federal immigration enforcement involvement in the death of a motorist, a...
Family
· May 19, 2026
· 51
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids
OVERLAND PARK, KS - The need for the construction of massive data storage centers has been in the news again recently, with the results of a new study...
Life
· Jul 14, 2026
· 73
Banned Books Table Full Of Bestsellers
LAKE ELSINORE, CA - According to sources, customers at a local Barnes & Noble became suspicious when it appeared that a display table marked as Ba...
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Premium
· Jun 15, 2026
· 68
How Was Church? June 15, 2026 Edition
Sunday is the best day of the week. The coffee tastes a little bit better when enjoyed with the people of the Lord. How was church for you yesterday? ...
Premium
· May 25, 2026
· 39
It's Memorial Day: Whom Are You Honoring?
Hey, Bee family!
Premium
· May 19, 2026
· 96
Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom
As you may have heard, Thomas Massie has officially been defeated in Kentucky's GOP primary, heralding the end of his Congressional tenure. Massie has...
Premium
· May 18, 2026
· 33
Rejected Babylon Bee Photoshop #3492
Our crack team of certified fake news specialists work tirelessly every day to bring you fake news you can trust. We've shared before about how our te...
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