The Babylon Bee
Scripture
· Nov 9, 2026
· 36
Joseph’s Brothers Jealous Of His Vintage Charlotte Hornets Starter Jacket
CANAAN - Tensions heightened in one prominent local family this week, as witnesses reported that Joseph's brothers had grown increasingly jealous of h...
U.S.
· Nov 9, 2026
· 45
Texas Adds Stars To State Flag To Represent All Six Genders
AUSTIN, TX - The state of Texas announced an update to its famous "Lone Star" flag, adding five more stars in order to represent all six genders.
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Finance
· Nov 7, 2026
· 82
Promises Kept: Democrats Deliver On Affordability By Making Stocks Way Cheaper
U.S. - Democrats proudly announced that they had already delivered on their campaign promise to improve affordability, having made stock prices far, f...
U.S.
· Nov 5, 2026
· 121
Do You Live In Texas? Here Are 12 Things You Should Do To Prepare For Democrats Taking Over
Listen up, Texans: most of you have never experienced living under Democratic rule, and there are some new realities you need to be ready for.
U.S.
· Nov 9, 2026
· 43
Heartbroken Eric Swalwell Learns Chinese Intelligence Has Been Seeing Other People
LIVERMORE, CA - Following the news that Chinese agents had been engaging in widespread "honeypot" operations across the United States for years, forme...
Politics
· Nov 9, 2026
· 56
Democrats Say They Now Have A Clear Mandate From Voters To Do All The Crazy Stuff They Never Mentioned In Their Campaigns
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Democrats announced on Monday that they now have a clear mandate from voters to do all the crazy stuff they never mentioned in thei...
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Politics
· Nov 6, 2026
· 100
Republicans Wishing There Had Been Some Kind Of Act They Could Have Passed To Save America
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Blindsided by Tuesday's midterm election debacle, Republicans were reportedly now wishing there had been some kind of act they coul...
Politics
· Nov 4, 2026
· 137
Cheer Up, Friends: Here Are 8 Silver Linings Of The Republicans Getting Blown Out
Turn those frowns upside down, everyone! Even though the Democrats won sweeping victories across the country in the midterms, it's not all bad news ou...
U.S.
· Nov 6, 2026
· 52
Karen Bass Says It Was Unfair For Voters To Judge Her Performance Based On That One Time The Entire City Burned Down
LOS ANGELES, CA - Los Angeles Mayor Karen Bass scolded the city's residents on Friday, saying it was unfair for them to judge her performance on a sin...
Politics
· Nov 5, 2026
· 47
After Seeing Election Results, Trump Announces Retaliatory Tariffs On America
WASHINGTON, D.C. - On Thursday morning, President Donald Trump announced retaliatory tariffs on the United States after his political party suffered m...
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Premium
· Nov 9, 2026
· 75
Subscriber Polls: Why Did The Republicans Lose The Midterms In A Blue Tsunami?
Well it looks like last week's midterm election may result in a Senate with at least 54 Democrat senators and a House with at least 254 Democrat repre...
Premium
· Nov 6, 2026
· 25
The Babylon Bee Weekly Roundup | November 6, 2026
It's been quite the week, but Friday has arrived at last! That means it's once again time for The Babylon Bee's Weekly Roundup - here are the biggest ...
Premium
· Nov 5, 2026
· 61
Office Buzz: 'Why Is *** Offensive?'
For writers like the intrepid journalists at The Babylon Bee, it sometimes looks like we're goofing around when what we're really doing is brainstormi...
Premium
· Nov 4, 2026
· 56
How To Keep Things In Perspective When The Commies Take Over
One of the main reactions conservatives can have to an election like we just witnessed, in which the radical Democrats seem poised to take everything ...
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